The 5 Critical Traits to being a Bad Guy by Chael P. Sonnen
In his latest blog at BadGuyInc.com, Sonnen breaks down how to be a bad guy correctly, in fighting and in life.
In 2013 Wanderlei Silva and Chael Sonnen were selected as opposing coaches for The Ultimate Fighter Brazil 3. For years Sonnen had riled up potential Brazilian opponents by casting aspersions on their culture, setting up a perfect heel vs. babyface season. Hatred ran so high Sonnen traveled in an armored SUV, with three armed bodyguards.
The fan feelings Sonnen stirred up are captured in this image of Brazilian Butthead and pals Beavis and Beavisinho, whose shirt doesn’t mean what he thinks it means.
Unfortunately, The Axe Murderer couldn’t stay on script. After the tryouts, with the 16 winners that day still waiting to be picked by one coach or the other, Wand gave Sonnen an ultimatum – apologize or I will leave. Sonnen didn’t apologize and Wand left, leaving the exhausted fighters further mystified. Later Wand physically attacked Sonnen.
Then Wand appeared uninspired as a coach and was perceived as a bully. Eight weeks on Brazilian fans hailed Sonnen as the hero of the season, much to The Bad Guy’s dismay. Eventually, the fight between the pair fell apart when both failed PED tests, Wand by literally running from a surprise test.
In his latest blog at BadGuyInc.com, Sonnen breaks down how to be a bad guy correctly, in fighting and in life.
Bad Guy 101: 5 Critical Traits
•Lose the need to be liked
•Don’t fall for your own hype
•Don’t hide your flaws
•Don’t explain who you are
•Don’t fear looking stupid
1. Lose the Need to Be Liked
Humans have an innate desire to be liked. We’ll go out of our way to impress people we don’t even respect, just hoping they will like us. And rightly so. Imagine living in a small tribe two thousand years ago. Everyone needed to work together for the group to survive, so it was good if the people you depended on happened to like you. But this need comes at a cost. If you’re driven by a constant desire to be liked, you’ll fail to develop to your full capabilities. You may find yourself saying yes to things that are not right for you. Or you may find yourself stepping back when there is opportunity to lead. Leaders don’t casually bend to the opinions of others—and Bad Guys are not afraid to have an enemy or two. I did everything in my power to make Wanderlei Silva the good guy so I could remain the Bad Guy. I understood how to leverage the power of negativity to build a large fan base. The Ax Murderer just needed to be loved.
2. Don’t Fall for Your Own Hype
The biggest mistake elite fighters, or successful people in any area of life make, is believing their own hype. Long-term success requires you to keep your public persona in perspective. You’re probably not as good as your raving fans think you are, nor as bad as your enemies say you are. The character you show the world is one element of your personality—don’t forget this or it will lead to your downfall.
3. Don’t Hide Your Flaws
Anyone who appears flawless will quickly elicit emotions of distrust. We are intimately aware of our own flaws and when we see someone who appears to have none, it’s off-putting. Show enough imperfections to prove you’re human, but never make excuses or apologize. If someone points them out, respond with an easy laugh. If you can’t laugh at yourself, you are not emotionally prepared to lead with your bad side. That fragile portion of your ego will seek unnecessary conflict and rob you of your ability to influence your surroundings. I insulted the nation of Brazil and then lost to the UFC’s most dominant Champion, Anderson Silva. My shortcomings were displayed for the whole world to see. Given the access and anonymity social media provides, you’ll occasionally take some heat for your deficiencies. But when managed properly, they endear you to the public and extend the life of your career.
4. Don’t Explain Who You Are
You can talk about yourself, but never try to explain who you are—it almost never works. Others will inevitably talk about you – let them talk. Practice ignoring the urge to explain yourself to anyone. It may be hard at first, but it’s a skill that gets easier with use. Any indication that you are concerned with someone else’s opinion of you will undermine your influence and social standing. There will be individuals immune to your charm. They may cast you in a negative light without knowing who you are. Never try to convince these people you are anyone other than their limited view. On occasion, some will change their minds of their own accord, and when they do, they will often become powerful allies whose loyalty runs deeper than some of your closest friends. The athletes on Team Sonnen proved this.
5. Don’t Fear Looking Stupid
Agreeing to appear on The Ultimate Fighter Brazil had elements of risk. No one wants to lose face or look incompetent. This fear alone stops many from acting. But there is no reward without risk, and everyone is entitled to look foolish from time to time. Tell your ego to go wait in the car while you get to work and you’ll quickly move past this fear. During the process, keep your mouth shut, pay attention, and work to master the basics. Don’t make excuses or talk down to yourself. Most importantly—don’t blame others when life doesn’t go your way.
Remember this…
We all have a Bad Guy inside. But a bad side is not the same as bad character. Bullies, thieves, and liars who manipulate the truth to harm the innocent should be culled from your flock. No kicking puppies allowed. Your bad side must be directed at a willing opponent who is capable of defending himself and mounting an offense.
Wand and Sonnen will fight – at last – in the main event of Bellator 180 on June 24, 2017 at Madison Square Garden in New York City, live on PPV. Fedor Emelianenko fights Matt Mitrione in the co-main.
