Bryce Mitchell is the hero we need

11-0 featherweight ‘Thug Nasty’ is whole after tearing his scrotum in a 2018 power drill accident, and after defeating Bobby Moffett via Unanimous Decision at UFC on ESPN+ 6 Saturday night, gave fans a post-fight speech for the ages.

Things @ThugNastyMMA loves:

1. Arkansas
2. Camo Shorts
3. Steak
4. Arkansas#UFCNashville pic.twitter.com/FFepzDODCN

— UFC (@ufc) March 24, 2019

As Mitchell explained later when the adrenaline passed, he wasn’t kidding about taking mom out for a steak, Reebok shorts in camo, or any of it.

I’m taking her to Texas Roadhouse, he said to Mike Bohn for MMA Junkie. It’s a done deal. She doesn’t get to pick because every time she picks she’s like, ‘Oh, I want to go here.’ Then she’ll change her mind. It’s a whole ordeal. I’m just going to tell her we’re going to Texas Roadhouse.

I’ve been wanting these camo shorts. They think I’m playing around about that. I’m dead serious, y’all got to get me some of those camo shorts. Like the real deal camo.

My whole career everyone has been telling me, ‘You got to leave Arkansas if you ever want to be good. You got to go here, go there or somewhere else’ like the water is special or they put their pants on a different way. I don’t know what it is, but everyone is telling me, ‘You got to leave Arkansas to be fancy.’ I just never believed it. I believed in myself, my teammates, my coaches, my family, my upbringing. That’s what I think about it.

I got a bunch of work going on at the house. Just a bunch of stuff. I got some Jerry Springer $#!@ going on with the girlfriend and everything. All that’s been going on. Just a bunch of stuff is going on. Balancing everything.

And consider this …

Bryce Mitchell also apparently requested new underwear every day on TUF so when he left he had amassed like 100 pairs so he would never need to buy underwear again. The man is a genius.

— Jed Meshew II (@JedKMeshew) March 24, 2019